Here are the 4 'don'ts' of university life

If there is any place on the planet with rules, it is the university. Lecturers have their own rules, your hall of residence has a ‘don’t’ policy on all things reasonable and your Teaching Assistant also gives some rules.

Fun fact, no one really cares about these rules except they are already in trouble. Now, these rules are not the ultimate ‘lifeguard’ or ‘airbag’ saviours but if you want to be a successful student, you cannot ignore these.

Don’t ever skip class

Yes! I know it does not make sense especially if you attend this unnamed university with the worst lecturers on earth. Honestly, this is first class, ‘Get all As’ recipe for all students whose lecturers take attendance. Whether you are in a class of any of the top two categories of ‘worst ever lecturers’; the boring guy trying to sound funny and the clueless other, just be there. Refusing to attend lectures means challenging, disobeying or downgrading the authority of your lecture, which equals threatening their egos. Trust me; you do not want to get on the wrong side of their ego.

Never date in your first year

Dear First Years, I appeal to you in all humility and to every thread of common sense you have, thou shalt not date in your first year. You know how society frowns on teenage pregnancy because it is just not the time to balloon your stomach with a foetus? Well, that is how dating in the first year was supposed to be until it was unanimously made cool by trendiness. Listen carefully, in this mystic of a universe of fake people and with your obvious “dumbheadedness” fresh out of high school, it is only safe to say, that the worst thing you could ever think about is a boy/girlfriend. You are going to be washed down like a ceramic plate and OMG if you are dropped…

Don’t ever pretend

Now this one may be very difficult for the average Joe. Naturally, we are induced to behave in the pattern of our societies and since the university is the hallmark of all people not real, it takes the transcendence of some higher will to be yourself. Do not give up yet! You still can try. Just ask yourself, how many people would I lose, courses would I fail, debts would I have to pay, values would I give up, to please some people I would almost always never see at the end of four year?

Don’t ever fight in Uni

Now, this is an actual rule that most people don’t know. Often times, you see college people quarrelling and being led by their primitive evolutionary instincts to rip their heads apart. Bruh, don’t fall for that temptation. If you meet this Goliath defiling the name of your ancestor, don’t be a heroic David, just walk away. If you get caught, you are going home.