Comparisons are never good, especially when you are subjecting your beloved to it. If you are ever tempted to do that, pause and remind yourself that you had lots of time at your disposal before you took the step to seal the relationship.
Once the scathing statements are uttered, no matter how much you may want to retract it back later, you cannot turn back the clock. The deed has been done.
However, you can still work on it to avoid a recurrence. Besides communicating well to reach an amicable solution to the problem, trying to set boundaries is the best way to avoid things going out of hand.
One such boundary includes keeping a check on certain statements that most couple often end up using during a squabble as they only worsen the matter.
Don't make such a big fuss
It is not always the bigger things, but regular, small things that can also cause trouble. And if one of you wants to discuss and sort them out, it does not necessarily mean that heshe is creating a fuss. And even if you feel so, avoid saying it aloud as it will only aggravate matters.
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Why can't you be like him or her?
This is the most unrealistic and hurtful remark. Comparisons are never good, especially when you are subjecting your beloved to it. If you are ever tempted to do that, pause and remind yourself that you had lots of time at your disposal before you took the step to seal the relationship. And if you still feel that you want someone who's more perfect than your current partner, then it reflects poorly on your decision making skills.
Stop being a drama queen
Well, no one likes to be called a drama queen. It makes a person feel that they're being dismissed or creating unnecessary ruckus, which triggers off more arguments. A rash statement, it hints at some kind of power struggle between a couple where one partner wants to dominate the other.
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It's your fault!
This statement is enough to unleash an endless round of blame game, making the real issue redundant. An unproductive exercise, it will leave your partner confused and they too will in turn try to find something to blame you. Have constructive arguments, which encourage clarity and reason while sharing your concerns.
There you start nagging again
Nagging can be part of some people's personality . If your partner fits into that category, it's best to avoid bringing that aspect up during a fight. Instead choose a more peaceful and pleasant time to discuss this trait with your partner and explain how it can come as annoyingly persistent at times.
That's it... I give up!
This statement may put an end to the argument as you say it and stomp off, but it will not serve the purpose at all. In fact, the uncomfortable silence on the issue may lead to resentment. Giving up is not a solution to the things you are going through, instead it reflects badly on your character. It shows that instead of working on issues you want an easy way out by running away from it.
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I want a divorce!
Most often people don't mean what they say during a fight; it's just said to spite the other. But bringing up words like divorce can rattle the strongest of relationship. The one at the receiving end will find it hard to shake it off from their memory for a long time, even after things have settled down between the couple. Say them only when you're ready to sign the papers.
You sound crazy!
Of course, you both will sound crazy dur ing a disagreement, but don't resort to calling each other names. People don't generally make sense when tempers flare. Things are often said in defiance and retaliation, and can make people look crazy . So calling the other person crazy would be absurd as it would be like the pot calling the kettle black. Simply avoid!