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Trotro Gimmicks - Obia Ntua Ne Lorry Fare!

There’s always an unfolding drama of one kind or the other. Half the people who board trotros are incredibly amusing. You could say their rants and wisecracks are ways at laughing at their frustrations.

One of the lessons in trotro gimmicks is delay tactics

I say this because many of us who use trotros as our main means of transportation will agree that trotros are like mini drama studios.

I think they have been sent by Laughorious, the god of laughter. In his mighty benevolence, Laughorious sends such people to make our lives a little less depressing.

A trip from Sukumono to Kasoa in a wobbly trotro should be the recipe for depression; but half the time it isn’t, all thanks to Laughorious, disagreeable passengers and gregarious driver’s mates. Amusing people, amusing moments; air-conditioned Chryslers can sit in the background.

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What isn’t amusing though is that very moment when you meet a ‘friend’ on the trotro. For some reason most Ghanaians expect their friend, a neighbour or that elder at church to pay for them once they meet in a trotro or a shared taxi.

It tickles Laughorious, hence he orchestrates affairs in such a manner that you meet your ‘friends’ when you’re economizing your cash. Seeing your friend grinning at you from the back of the trotro can be an unpleasant surprise; more so the encounter is shattering by all estimations. This is because even before you spotted your friend, you had written him or her out of your budget. Your last budget GH10.00 reads something like this:

Spintex to Tetteh Quarshie Roundabout: GHȻ2.10

Tetteh Quashie Roundabout to Madina: GHȻ1.60

Journey back home: GHȻ3.70

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Roasted Plantain and Groundnut: GHȻ2.50

That’s your airtight budget, so finding yourself in such a situation calls for desperate actions which scientists have classified as trotro gimmicks. Trotro gimmicks is an art reserved for those careful serious enough to school themselves in it. The first lesson in trotro gimmicks is . You have to position yourself in the right place so the mate reaches for your friend’s money first. On a lucky day, you can sneak to the last lane when you see that your friend is on the third lane. By the time the mate gets to you, your friend would have paid for the both of you, or at least for himself.

The second lesson in trotro gimmicks is . Here, you take your money with an exaggerated flair so as to allow your friend see that you really plan to respect yourself. Then hold on to it until he pays. After he pays, giggle a little and say “oh you shouldn’t have. Next time wai.”

is the final tactic, and it requires the greatest dexterity. It can only be applied if you’re the first to spot your friend. The moment you lay eyes on your friend, take a 2-second deep breath to prepare yourself for the next step. After you exhale, take out your phone and keep your eye glued to it until you get to your destination. Don’t you say hello to anyone, you love your phone and it alone will you interact with. Obia ntua ne lorry fare!

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