It's important to block off time within your day where the conversation isn't about the coronavirus, says Daniel Saynt, founder and chief conspirator of The New Society for Wellness ( ), a private members club for the adventurous. We're being bombarded by bad news right now, and the added stress is affecting our libidos and many of us are seeking any kind of release, he says. Scheduling a time to have a conversation focused on intimacy and mutual pleasure can help you find this releaseoffering you a moment of bliss that also helps another person in lockdown do the same.

Phone sex is a way to share a sexual experience with your partner when you're not in the same room together. It's not a requirement, but you and your partner might choose to masturbate as you hear each other's voices and surrounding sounds through the phone.

Oftentimes, talking on the phone will encourage you to open up in new ways, as you wont be distracted by trying to interpret your partners body language or facial expressions, says Dr. Jess OReilly, Resident Sexologist. And some people find that theyre willing to explore fantasies over the phone that theyre too nervous to discuss in person as there is no pressure to act on them from a distance." So, for example, perhaps you fantasize about being gagged , but dont want to feel the pressure to follow through; the distance of phone sex can assuage feelings of undue pressure.

Dr. Jess loves the idea of phone sex (as opposed to video sex ) because she thinks it can feel less intimidating and leaves more room for the imagination. Additionally, she notes that many people are aroused by sounds, from the melody of a lovers voice to the rustling of sheets in the background.

Most of us arent born phone sex pros, so its helpful to have a rough idea of what you want to say (or topics you want to discuss) while having phone sex. According to Dr. Jess gave some suggestions for what to talk about: what youve done in the past; what youre doing right now; what you want to do in the future; your most exciting sexual memories; your hottest sexual fantasies; and fantasies you may not want to explore in real life, but turn you on nonetheless. That last option speaks to one of phone sexs strengths: There are certain things that you might not want to do in real life, but you can explore over the phone.

Even though your partner can't see you, you should still create an arousing sexual atmosphere for yourself. Light some candles, bring the lights down low, and wear something that makes you feel sexyor dont wear anything at all, recommends Saynt.

You want to be as present as possible during the conversation. Give yourself at least 30 minutes where you'll be uninterrupted, says Saynt. That means lock your dog in the other room and dont have any calls planned for after the session; it would suck to be in the middle of something hot and then need to hang up because you have a work call you need to take.

Turn your phone on to Do Not Disturb, says Engle. Stay in the moment and give the person you're phone-sexing the same attention you would if they were physically with you."

Sex toys are the spice of life and using them during phone sex is a great way to experiment and enhance your time together, says Engle. Sex toys are for everyone, not just people with vulvas. There are prostate massagers , masturbation sleeves , cock rings of all varieties, butt plugs and more. Experiment and don't worry about getting weird with it!

If it interests you and your partner, go ahead and take a pic or little video of what youre doing while youre having phone sex with your partner, and send that to them, suggests Dr. Jess. This adds a little bit of visual stimulation to the auditory.

If youre both new to phone sex, it can be helpful to have one person lead the conversation to keep it moving, says Saynt. Have one person be the more active one of the couple, sharing their fantasies, what theyre doing to themselves, or describing what it is they want their partner to do.

You can use phone sex to get aroused and then hang up so that you have two hands and less pressure to finish off on your own, says Dr. Jess. After all, the experience is about bonding with your partnerits not just about finishing. If you just wanted to orgasm, you could have masturbated to porn by yourself.

Dont expect your partner to follow through in real life based on what theyve said over the phone. You might explore fantasies that are highly arousing on the phone, but you may not want to live them out in the flesh, says Dr. Jess. Sometimes, fantasies are better left as fantasies.

Take your time and draw it out to build anticipation, says Dr. Jess. Youre in no rush to get anywhere. Besides, the anticipation is often the best part! Start by talking about how youve been thinking about them all day. Then move into what youre wearing. Then you can move into what it is you want your partner to do.

Being quiet during phone sex is not hot, says Engle. This isn't the library, make some noise. "It lets your partner know that you're into it, and they need that during phone sex since they dont have visual cues," she says. Besides, encouragement is sexy. You can use phrases like, Damn, it turns me on hearing you doing that, and Shit, you are so sexy.

Saint adds, The experience is a new one for many, so there will be some initial awkwardness, but once you get through it and start playing with yourself, it's a lot easier to just let the moans take over.