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5 reasons why a guy may not want to sleep with you

Si kila saa mambo ya...

Yes, men too have their “not tonight babe” moments and it could be for a number of reasons as explained by sex therapist Laurie J Watson in Psychology Today.

Performance anxiety

“Regardless of whether he feels desire, if a man has problems getting or keeping an erection, or if he has troubles lasting a fair time during intercourse, he may hesitate to initiate,” says Ms. Watson.

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Ms. Watson further explained that a man experiencing performance anxiety may be misinterpreted by their partner as a sign that they have lost attraction in their partner.

Low testosterone

Ms. Watson explained that a dip in a man’s testosterone levels could lead to “reduced desire and often poorer erections.

“Most men have a great supply of testosterone, the “hungry-for-sex” hormone, all their lives. When desire wanes, and the man’s experience is different than earlier in his relationship, it’s time to go to the doctor.”

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They prefer to self-satisfy

Yeah, so apparently some men may prefer to masturbate instead of having sex with their partners. Ms. Watson believes that this could be because they want to “take a break from depending on another to meet their sexual needs”.

“Often, they use porn because it’s easy, it’s exciting and it’s efficient. And it spares them the sexual negotiation with a partner that can feel exhausting. Even when their partner wants more than they do, a man might withhold sex out of an unconscious need for the autonomy of sexual aloneness.”

Okay then.

The woman may be the problem without realizing

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Saying things like “all men want is sex” could, according to Ms. Watson, be considered to be male-bashing.

“While women typically respond best to a slow sexual approach, the truth is, sometimes men want to just “get after it” when they feel the urge. With a body full of testosterone, they are sexual kindling to the sexual stimuli all around, and it can be discouraging when they have a female partner who cannot fathom what it feels like to ignite instantaneously.”

They may be having an affair

A man may reject physical intimacy because they may be having an affair.

“Affairs can start because of sexual frustration, but they are often a complicated solution to seemingly unsolved problems within the primary relationship.”

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A man may either be feeling guilty to have sex with their partners because they are already sexually satisfied.

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