Ever cheated on your partner? Here's why sexual temptation is extremely powerful (VIDEO)

oge okonkwo

May 22, 2015 2:48 PM

According to Perel, cheating is "universally forbidden, but universally practiced." Why then is it so rampant?

Cheating Wife

Relationship therapist, Esther Perel discussed the issue of infidelity in relationships on her latest TED Talk, exploring the the ins and outs of cheating, what really stands out is why we want what we can't have ... and why we go to great lengths to get it.

She further explains that the power of the forbidden is simply irresistible. We know it's wrong, and we know it will hurt our spouse or significant other, but we do it anyway. We want it, and even if/when we obtain it, what we give up in exchange leads to great loss, making reference to Adam and Eve in the bible.

The real question becomes "why do people continue to cheat?"

Perel answers that, "People are deeply monogamous in their beliefs, but find themselves in a conflict between their values and their behavior. [They] cross a line they didn't think they'd ever cross ... and for what?"

It's almost as if cheaters are stepping outside themselves, acting like people they never thought they would be or become. "I would never cheat" is now replaced with "But what if I could?"

What is so important that we'd risk our relationship — or our marriage with the one we pledged eternal commitment to — for the sake of getting what we want? Why do we listen to this voice in our head telling us to stray? What is the core driving force that brings us to cheat?

According to Perel, it's not the risk of losing our partner's trust. In fact, it's a much deeper issue within our own person that causes problems from the get-go.

Watch the complete video above.

oge okonkwo