The best defence against cheating is to make the relationship so great, that your partner has too much to lose by cheating.
Cheating on your partner, it would seem, has become an accepted part of having a relationship, but it shouldn’t be. Cheating hurts and it betrays a trust, and there really is no excuse for it. But, cheating is often a symptom of a deeper problem in a relationship, so here we explore some of the things that can be done to prevent cheating in a relationship:
1. Understand and agree on the boundaries
What constitutes cheating can vary from person to person. Is it OK to dance with another person, kiss a person or give them a hug? Or, to your partner, does this mean that you have cheated? There needs to be a clear understanding of what cheating means to each of you, and then there can be no mistakes.
2. Be best friends, as well as starry eyed lovers
It’s important to be good friends, as well as lovers. You need to be able to talk to one another openly or you will find that some things are being kept a secret.
3. Learn to grow and change together
Couples need to be able to grow, in their right, and together. Everyone needs new challenges and new opportunities, so pursue those together and no one will feel the need to go elsewhere to broaden their horizons.
4. Make staying faithful a no brainer
The best defence against cheating is to make the relationship so great, that your partner has too much to lose by cheating. Communication is the key here, talk to each other about what you want, and make sure that you take account of each other’s needs.
5. Keep things interesting and try new things together
Boredom is often cited as a reason for cheating, so keep things interesting and try different things. This is not just restricted to being adventurous in the bedroom! It also means going out to different places, taking up new hobbies and even changing the channel you watch on TV.
6. Be there for each other and listen
You’ve heard it before: ‘My wife / husband / boyfriend /girlfriend doesn’t understand me’. That is as much a symptom of not listening, as it is about not understanding. Listen, when your partner says ‘let’s do something different this weekend’, or they could be doing something different next weekend with someone else.
7. Don’t take your relationship for granted or you can find yourself surprised, and alone!
Don’t assume that your partner is happy and never assume that nobody else would put with them! Just because you would never consider living apart doesn’t mean that they feel the same way. Taking someone for granted is a sure way to finding yourself surprised, and alone.
8. Don’t be too controlling
Complaining, nagging and criticising can all add up to an unhappy relationship. You are in a sharing partnership and no one of you should be controlling the other. If you are trying to control your partner, you might find that they suffer in silence, until one day, they go elsewhere for solace.
9. Be sure to let your partner know that they are appreciated and loved
You may well love your partner, care about them and would never want to be apart from them. But, when did you last tell them that? It’s about taking things for granted again, so don’t assume that your partner feels loved, tell them that they are.
10. Don’t cheat on your partner!
Cheating means different things to different people, as we have already said. Men, in particular, are very sensitive to what they might see as cheating and, even if it’s only emotional, their way of hitting back can often be cheating in revenge. In the long run, no one wins by cheating. It is far better to just be honest.