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Here’s why revenge affair is never a good idea

Here’s why revenge affair is never a good idea [Credit - Getty]

Trying to get a relationship back on track by first going so far away from it, sounds like such a bad, bad idea.

When one partner cheats on the other in a relationship, there can be no way to gauge what the aggrieved person would do, neither is there a right standard of behaviour for such person to live by. In that period of discovery, at least.

As we wrote here, “you can’t determine how your partner reacts or what they choose as payback when they catch you cheating because when it comes to matters of the heart, there aren’t rules guiding reciprocity. What you see is what you get.”

Of course, this does not cover criminal actions.

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And as it is, reactions could range from the most lethargic to the most aggressive. Some partners would cry and throw weak punches before picking their stuff and dumping you. Some others would try to inflict physical harm even if they would eventually stay long enough for things to get patched and the relationship, back on track.

For some others, their response to being cheated on would be to get back their own pound of flesh. If you cheat on them, better get prepared to get cheated on right back. This phenomenon is known as retaliatory cheating.

What this means, as the name literally states, is that a partner goes on his or her own cheating spree after discovering that a partner has been messing around town. It is pretty much a way of saying ‘while I may want to remain in this relationship, I want to go out and sample other people just as you have done.’

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But as Kenyan website, Standard Media puts it: “retaliation affairs are extremely dangerous and instead destroys any relationship’s chances of recovery.

“Instead of dealing with the cheating partner the couple ends up dealing with multiplied issues, which complicate the entire scenario. The outcome is usually fatal and leaves the offender more injured than before.”

It also goes without saying that two wrongs don’t make a right, and that the decision to go sleep with another person just to get back at a cheating partner only distresses the fabric relationship further.

It’s a no-brainer; if you intend to remain with that partner, it means you are prepared to look past what they have done and try to navigate the relationship back to a happy place. This presupposes your willingness and readiness to forgive and/or do only things that will help you achieve that goal.

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Going on a cheating spree of your own does not seem to tally with that objective. So except you intend to leave that cheating partner for good, then it might make sense to just skip the whole revenge cheating thing altogether.

Revenge cheating also sucks it makes reconciliation a little more difficult than it has to be and creates more problems than you actually need to deal with in your quest for rebuilding the trust in the relationship.

So when a partner cheats on you, just dump them if you can’t stand them anymore. Trying to get the relationship back on track by first going far away from it, sounds like [and is actually] a bad idea.

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