Pity sex: 4 signs you are having this kind of intimacy

Pity sex is when you get with someone you feel sorry for. Or vice versa. It could be that someone feels sorry for you and they have sex with you to make you feel better.

You feel guilty about withholding sex for much longer and decide to just “give in” and have sex. The sex you have is far from passionate and one or both of you may seem “not totally into it” but you do it anyway. This is pity sex.

Pity sex happens when a person doesn’t really have a longing for sexual pleasure but does it anyway, mostly just so that their partner doesn’t feel bad. Sometimes this can be characterised by the lack of interest your partner has in the relationship, or specifically towards sex. If you are confused about this, then here are some signs you just had pity sex:

Your partner never initiates sex

If it is always you who is eager to have sex and not your partner, then it can be quite concerning. Chances are that your partner shows interest only so that you don’t feel bad. And if you are the one who is always making the first move, then it’s indicating pity sex.

Your partner doesn’t like too much touching, foreplay

If your partner gets irked, every time you try to be touchy with them, then it’s a sign they aren’t into you. Touching, kissing, hugging etc. are forms of a healthy physical relationship but if that’s becoming a problem then you need to have a word with your partner very soon. It's a sign of having pity sex.

Your partner is always distracted

If your partner is constantly spacing out during sex, then it’s a sign they aren’t really interested. They are just doing it for the sake of it. Their mind is preoccupied with several other things because they aren’t enjoying the sex as much as they would want to.

Your partner wants to get done with sex

Every time you both have sex, your partner shows how they just want to get done with it. This is because they are either dissatisfied or aren’t invested in sex as they were before. They just want to be done with it as soon as possible and get on with doing their work or anything else.