Pulse Opinion: Here's why it doesn't make sense to let Zodiac signs guide your love life

Many things may be responsible for your relationship mess ups; being Sagittarius or Capricorn isn't one of them.

It is unwise to take breaks from your relationship when things are not going right

It's so easy to pin all the blame on someone else; to claim that it is because of the actions and inactions of everyone but them that those issues became insurmountable to the point of grinding the relationship to a full stop.

One’s ears gets filled to the brim when stories are narrated of failed relationships and the reasons why many love stories abruptly ended.

We hear of relationships that failed due to incompatible genotypes and irreconcilable differences [a term which may sometimes covers some absurd, ridiculous reasons]; and then we also hear of outrightly weird reasons that makes you wonder if people ever take relationships serious these days or if everyone just goes into romantic affairs with one leg in, and the other poised to leap out at the faintest of provocations or slightest of problems.

Take for instance, the issue of Zodiac signs and their overrated influences on behaviour and relationships.

There's always something to blame for every failed relationship, but your Zodiac sign is not the reason why your past relationships failed.

It is becoming quite the common thing to see social media posts listing the Zodiac signs, – Leo, Sagittarius, Aries, Capricorn etc - the traits particular to them, those they are compatible with and those they should never date for incompatibility reasons.

At other times, the posts just go on to list the sexual behaviours of the signs. Most of the reactions to these posts point to an acceptance of the authenticity of these sign recommendations.

I think this is arrant rubbish and believing in them as serious reasons why you should not date someone or honestly projecting them as serious justifications for your toxic relationship behaviours is not only puerile and ignorant AF but also lazy and unfair to your partner. Holding them up as acceptable excuses for your partner's mistreatment of you is just as nonsensical, I must add.

And the reason for this is simple – every relationship operates, lives, breathes and thrives on effort.

Effort in this sense should not be equated to an unreasonably drawn-out putting up with negativity or toxicity. No.

Effort in this context is used with the hope of portraying the positive energy invested by two people into a relationship that matters to them.

As a Quora user, James McAvoy writes in response to the question of how applicable

"In all romantic relationships you are engaged in an ongoing negotiation with another person to try an achieve the best possible mutually beneficial outcome."

The time, actions and words used by two people to sculpt a relationship to their idea of perfection is the effort we speak of here. If you want a relationship, you should be willing and ready to actually do the work required.

Perfection in the ideal sense is not what anybody expects in a relationship, of course, but everyone hopes to meet someone who will, with love, bring the best versions of themselves into the relationship. And when that best version falls short, one would hope that such partner would be willing to improve and get better. That’s effort. That's everyone's expectation in a relationship whether they are to admit it or not.

That’s what everyone deserves from anyone who claims to love them, and what everyone should have who desires to find a kind of love that is warm, beautiful and beautifying.

To fall short of this standard of effort and pin the blame on your Zodiac sign and what it says you are would be a travesty, in all honesty.

It’s not in my place to tell you that your belief in horoscope is wrong or right. Everyone has a right to their beliefs. On the other hand, I can tell you for free that whatever negative thing your Zodiac sign profiles you as does not necessarily have to represent your reality. It does not, and should not be a conclusive definition of you.

There is a reason why you have a mind, why you have a will. You can become a less temperamental, unendurable woman if you choose to be. Your Zodiac sign and it's prediction of you being difficult be damned! You can be a better man to your partner or potential partners if you decide to.

On this subject of Zodiac signs and relationships, Nancy Colours says on knowlege sharing platform, Quora, that:

"Everyone is an individual. Life shapes us all in our own way. I think it is an added insight: astrological aspects in our chart or our partner’s chart. Should it define compatibility? Absolutely not. Humans are creatures of free will and relationships take mutual efforts…"

Life is a product of your choices and you can either choose to love someone wholeheartedly or not. You can either choose to correct your character flaws or not. You can choose to be a better partner or push your girl into the arms of another.

Everyone has the option of being scum. So whatever positive or negative decision you choose to make from all of this is all yours and you are the one who should be blamed for whatever the outcome of your moves are.

Your Zodiac sign, no matter how accurate its configuration and predictions are, can not, and should never be held up as a replacement of you when blame is being apportioned for your actions in romantic relationships or any other form of human interaction.

You must be living in some grand delusion to think there can be any other way to view this relationship and marriage thing.

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