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Relationship Tips Flirting online - dos and don’ts

It is important to be yourself and allow your sense of humour to come through. But again, don’t overdo it, it is way too soon to use pet names. Don’t start call him pawpaw, you don’t know him like that, just take it easy.

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So, you took a risk and decided to message that online friend you like very much and wish to know more of. Well done, the road to finding love is paved with courage and it is perfectly fine for an adult to be flirty sometimes.

Now, if your goal is to flirt, let’s talk about some dos and don’ts:

1. Don’t just send “Hi” or "Hey, what's up?!"

If you are trying to start a conversation, start a conversation. If you say hi, the response could just be hi and then, there is that awkward silence.

If she say “Hey, nothing much” to your “Hey, what’s up.” What will be your next move? It is better to say something more than just hi or what’s up, comment about a post they made or ask what they’ve been up today. When they respond to one question remember to ask lots of follow-up questions.

2. Don't be overly flirty.

Don’t jump right to, “I think you are hot” or “I would like my lips pressed against yours.” That might just create a lot of awkwardness. Try having a real conversation instead. Get the other person talking, if you want to have a fun, flirty conversation. Flirting comes naturally with good conversation.

You can imply that you are interested in more than platonic relationship but don’t be tasteless about it. Also, don't "like" every one of his or her statuses, photos, and wall posts. That is just creepy.

3. Be playful but don’t start giving pet names

It is important to be yourself and allow your sense of humour to come through. But again, don’t overdo it, it is way too soon to use pet names. Don’t start call him pawpaw, you don’t know him like that, just take it easy.

Allow the relationship to grow naturally, don’t force it. Expand your ways of online communications overtime, try using video chatting or online calling as well.

4. Don’t lie about your interests and characteristics

I have already said it is important to be yourself if you want to flirt and find a genuine connection with someone. Don’t be a poser, don’t claim to be or have things you don’t have. 

If the flirty progresses from online to meeting you in person, make sure that he or she won’t feel like they are meeting an entirely different person from the one they have been talking to online. Also, don’t believe everything other people write about themselves.


5. Don’t be a nuisance 

Make sure the person you are flirting with actually wants to talk to you. If they are responding with short one word answers like “cool”,  “ok”,  “fine” or “lol” then they are not interested in flirting or talking with you, respect that and give your attention to someone else.

On the other hand, if you message someone and they respond, ensure not to abandon the conversation midway. Always respond in a timely manner, don’t leave them waiting. If you have to go remember to say something like, "Good talking to you, enjoy the rest of the day."

6. No nudes or vulgarity

Flirting is not is pornography. Don’t send a picture of your junk. There is no need to be profane. Keep some mystery. Keep some privacy. Get to know someone before you give out intimate details. Remember the Internet never forgets, once you send nude photos of yourself online, it out of your control. Protect yourself.

7. Don’t meet with people you do not really know yet

Try to find out more about them through a mutual friend and even after you feel you know them a little bit, always meet in public places until you know each other well enough. Make the first meeting very public, you don't want to hook up with a rapist or serial killer in his or your house. Go online and see what else you can find out.

By Dormaa Yeboah

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