Learning how to tell someone you don’t like them is an important life skill. Offering the truth, especially when difficult, will help you in so many future experiences. Plus, it is the only way to let someone down respectfully.
Most of us know what it feels like to be rejected. It sucks. Because of that, we don’t want to hurt someone else by telling them we don’t like them. But, sometimes there is no way to avoid it.
If you don’t know how to tell someone you don’t like them, you’ll be hiding from difficult conversations forever. Taking the time to learn how to tell someone you don’t like them and doing it with grace and honesty is always the best move for you and them.
Here’s how to tell someone you don’t like them without being rude:
- Be prepared for their response
This could go a lot of ways. Not everyone sees things like that. Some people may be very upset. They may accuse you of leading them on or ask more specific questions. Some people want to know what they did wrong or even make you feel guilty. Know that going in there are many ways they could react, so try to be patient.
- Don’t coddle them
This is where the line between caring and too caring blurs. You want to apologize and comfort the person you’re letting down, but it is not your job. You can be polite and respectful, but trying to comfort them sends mixed messages.
If you get pulled into comforting this person, it can give them false hope that something could happen later on and keep them infatuated with you.
- Do it sooner rather than later
Just like a breakup, the longer you wait, the worse it will be. If you know someone likes you and you don’t like them, just let them know. It will be uncomfortable, but it will get worse the longer you wait. Not only will your own anxieties increase as you put them off, but they will likely feel worse the longer you wait.
- Put yourself in their shoes
During this conversation and leading up to it remember what it feels like to be rejected. Consider how you would respond in a similar situation. It can be hard to see this situation from another viewpoint, but it can help you remain as sympathetic as possible.
- Give them space
You don’t need to check in on them to see how they’re doing. Let them be. Whether you work together, are friends, or simply run in the same crowd, give them space to move on. If you are constantly around or even sending them memes, it will be hard to distance yourself from their feelings for you.