9 people you shouldn’t feel pressured to invite to your wedding

Are you planning your wedding and you’re feeling stressed out about cutting potential guests?

Wedding guests

It is totally normal to be a little worried about not inviting people to your wedding. The good news? You don’t have to invite everyone.

Weddings are a huge expense, especially if you are planning a wedding on a budget and there is a reason you can’t invite the entire world—it would cost a fortune.

Plus, some people just want to have an intimate celebration with a small, select group of people.

Whatever your style is, when it comes time to make your guest, there are some people you shouldn’t feel forced to invite.

Here’s a list of them below:

  • Every single co-worker

Depending on where you work, you may feel some sort of pressure to invite a ton of people from the office. And while you may have friendships with some people from work, it is unlikely that you’ve forged a close bond with everyone. If you frequently text about topics outside of work or you spend time together on the weekend, you can go ahead and extend the invite. If you have a strictly professional relationship with your bosses or coworkers—it’s okay to skip them.

  • Distant family members

Just because you’re related doesn’t mean the invitation is automatic—especially if you have close friends who have earned the invite. And don’t let guilt from other family members get you down. It’s your day—you (and your partner) get to make the final decision on who is in and who is out.

  • Plus ones

This is a tough one. If you ask your friends opinion on this, the response you get might vary. Some might say it’s rude to invite people without a plus one. I mean, have you been to a wedding without a plus one? Regardless, if you’re really trying to cut your list down and the friend you’re inviting doesn’t have a long-term beau? It’s okay to invite them without a guest, as long as you know they’ll have people to talk to and be comfortable with.

  • Ex-lovers

When you have a strong bond with someone, it’s hard to believe that one day it would be inappropriate for them to be there for your big day. Unless you dated ages ago and the ex hangs with you and you’re betrothed often and things are totally cool, it’d probably be best to leave them off the list. After all, an ex should stay an ex for a reason. Even if your mother totally loves your ex, don’t send them a save the date.

  • Friends from high school or college

We all have those people. The friends we swore we’d grow old with. The ones who knew everything about us back in 10th grade. Over the years something happened, you grew apart from one another. It’s hard to imagine the old crew not being there for your big day, but if you haven’t been close with them in a while—it's time to reconsider. It doesn’t have to be a battle of college friendships vs. high school friendships when it comes to who’s getting invites. Just because you were great friends at one time does not make you obligated to invite them.

  • A couple whose wedding you went to

In a perfect world, I suppose it would be polite to invite someone whose wedding you were invited to, but it certainly is not an obligation. Maybe their wedding was over a decade ago or maybe you’ve fallen out. Or perhaps you were a last-minute invite to fill their quota. Regardless, an invite to their wedding does not equal an invite to yours.

  • Children

Love them or just like them, only you and your fiancé get to decide if your wedding is kid-friendly. Things to consider: is your venue suitable for kids? Will the parents be able to enjoy themselves and keep an eye on their children? You can decide to invite only the children of the family or none at all! In my opinion, most parents would gladly take the night off of parenting for a celebration. If the child is closer to a teen than a toddler, count them as an adult!

  • Neighbours

Chances are, your neighbour knows about it. Depending on where you live, it can be hard to avoid the folks next door, and maybe you don’t want to. But when it comes to your wedding, if the neighbours are just casual friends, you can safely take them off the list.

  • Anyone who doesn’t approve of your marriage

This one may seem like a no-brainer, but a lot of people feel guilty and obligated to invite people who haven’t been supportive of their relationship. Let me be clear: if they don’t, they fall into the category of people you shouldn’t feel forced to invite to your wedding. If for any reason you’re considering inviting someone who has been negative about your relationship—don’t. Those people have no place on the guest list. Screw the judgmental ones.

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