Of course it’s entirely understandable that you cannot bear to talk about this to anyone — as much in self-protection as in consideration for the standing of the husband who has shocked and hurt you so much.
Nevertheless you shouldn’t have to go through this alone, which is why it would do you good to get in touch to find out your nearest centre.
This is a story of a woman whose husband visits prostitutes.
For almost 45 years I have been happily married to the same man (we are in our 60s) and have a married son and daughter and four grandchildren.
But three weeks ago I found out that for the past five years my husband has been visiting a massage parlour about three or four times a year.
He tells me he has never had full sex, but that they have performed other sexual acts on him.
My husband is a good husband and father but for the past six years or so has not shown me much affection, especially in the bedroom.
Up until then we always had good sex then he told me he didn’t have the same urges.
I assured him it was not just about sex, but I needed love. I often told him that I felt he just had brotherly love for me.
I occasionally cuddled up to him but then I just felt he didn’t want me. He was even prescribed Viagra from the doctor, then made the excuse that his blood pressure was high.
I am writing to you because I have no one I can speak to.
I don’t want to confide even to my best friend (I’ve known for 60 years) because of the shame of it all and I don’t want my family to find out.
Why do I want to protect this man who has deceived me? He tells me he loves me and has never stopped loving me and wants us to stay together.
He is totally remorseful and very upset at what he has done to me and wants us to get back to how things were before this all happened.
I am absolutely shocked, devastated, jealous and heartbroken and cannot believe his deceit.
I think about what has happened every minute of the day and how he prefers these other women to me.
Do you think there is a future for us? At this moment in time I feel I will never forgive him or get over it.