This is a list of the most embarrassing things that could go wrong during any wedding:
THE BATHROOM STRUGGLE
To pee or not to pee, that is the question. If you do, know that somebody’s going to have to help you do it when you’re wearing that dress! But what if you don’t just need to pee?
YOU SAY THE WRONG NAME AT THE ALTAR
Saying the wrong name in the privacy of your bed during a mind-scrambling orgasm is bad enough, but in front of all the ones you love on the biggest day of your life? Now that would be horrific. Your parents will have to give you couples therapy as your wedding gift.
SWEARING DURING YOUR VOWS
It’s not easy to remember all those words with everyone watching and champagne in your system. Be careful, or else your wedding video will need a parental advisory.
YOUR STRAPLESS DRESS WON’T STAY UP
Between the bride and the bridesmaids, there are usually way too many strapless dresses being worn at weddings. One of those gowns is bound to accidentally come down one day.
YOU PASS GAS IN FRONT OF EVERYONE
Weddings, with the loud music and chatter, are usually a great place to be when you have unexpected gas. That is until someone gives a speech. Everyone becomes so quiet you can hear a pin drop. Or something else. Our advice? Save it for the dance floor, sister.
YOU LOSE YOUR LUNCH DURING THE CHAIR LIFT
You know what people love to do to brides and grooms who have been filled with cake and champagne for several hours? Pick them up and bounce them around in a chair. Somebody needs to take the champagne out of the bucket because it will probably have a new purpose in 5, 4, 3, 2…1.
YOU ENCOUNTER GUESTS YOU’VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE
You’re supposed to know everybody at your wedding. But you don’t. For the time being, smile and pretend you know them anyway.
AWKWARD SLOW DANCE
Creepy guests will try to slow dance with you, and you don’t want to blow up their spot by saying, “Get away from me!” while everyone is watching. So just keep your smile as bright as you can while your new cousin puts his hands a little too close to your butt.
YOU FAINT IN YOUR CORSET
It may be nice to have a teeny tiny waist for your photos, but you may also wake up to the paramedics standing at the altar with you. It’s not worth it.
SOMEONE FORGETS TO TURN ON THE MIC
It’s not like people usually hoot and holler during your vows, so how would you know if they’re politely sitting there barely understanding a word you’re saying?