How to know you're in a good relationship: 6 clear signs

Of course, no relationship is perfect, so it’s important to acknowledge that there will be bumps in the road. Even the happiest of good relationships have their moments. But the anxiety of living in a broken or bad relationship takes so much energy that all your focus can go there, making it difficult to concentrate and do the things you need to do.

However, when you’re in a good romantic relationship, you usually know. You’re happy, feel secure and stable, feel supported and are optimistic for the future—most of the time.

A good, or healthy, relationship is ideally one where there’s an understanding of partnership, shared values as well as positive experiences such as joy, humour, contentment, excitement and even safety.

If you’re wondering whether or not your relationship qualifies as a “good” relationship, here are some of the key signs for you:

You both feel secure

Feeling secure emotionally, mentally and physically is important for any time of relationship, but especially a romantic one. This means that you feel secure in your ability to express your personal needs and feel supported in your relationship without questioning your well-being.

Security within a relationship allows for consistency and stability and is the foundation that enables vulnerability and trust.

You have empathy for each other

If you care for each other’s feelings as much, if not more than, you care for your own, this is called empathy and it’s incredibly important when it comes to a happy relationship. Empathy is what creates a sense of belonging and allows intimacy to flourish.

When you know there is an empathic essence that lives in your partner, even if there are difficult moments, you feel safe.

You’re both committed to building trust

Trust is a non-negotiable characteristic of a healthy and positive relationship.

Trust between partners offers freedom and security in your relationship no matter where your partner is or what they are doing and takes away the obsessive and intrusive thoughts that you may have in a relationship that lacks trust and encourages a peaceful union. When you trust that your partner has your best interests at heart, you can resolve conflict more maturely.

You communicate effectively

To navigate our different points of view, we have to have good communication skills. Not only does open communication help with relationship problems, but it also helps restore the intimacy between the couple.

It is important to know how to express yourselves to your partners in a calm, respectful and productive way, which in turn will maximize the likelihood of them hearing your needs clearly and feeling motivated to meet them.

You're open to feeling vulnerable

While it may feel scary and intimidating, being vulnerable and open with your partner allows them to truly get to know the real you and also enhance the connection between you. Without vulnerability, a relationship may plateau and feel stagnant.

You relieve each other's distress

In a healthy intimate relationship, your partner eases your stress more than they cause it; they make you feel relieved at the end of the day. “Knowing exactly what to do or say to lift your partner's spirits, put their mind at ease and remove actual obstacles to their well-being is critical to a strong relationship.

Experts say that couples need to know how to soothe each other when one person is upset, which means moving toward, not away from your partner when they are in distress, using loving touch, eye contact, listening to their worries and providing reassuring words to help alleviate their suffering.