Counsellor Adofoli clashes with Wodemaya over ‘no premarital counselling’ advice
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Marriage counsellor and Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) practitioner, Frank Edem Adofoli, has criticised Ghanaian YouTuber, Wode Maya over comments discouraging young couples from seeking marriage counselling.
Taking to his social media pages to respond to Wode Maya’s remarks, Mr Adofoli said the comments showed a lack of appreciation for what counselling, particularly marriage counselling, truly entails.
He stated,
I understand that you may not fully appreciate what counselling is, especially marriage counselling. However, suggesting that couples should simply spend time together, make mistakes, and discover what works best without guidance sounds like dismissing the value of professional support.
Mr Adofoli likened such advice to encouraging untrained individuals to drive without learning the basics.
It is like asking someone to start a car and drive without proper training or knowledge. When they crash, they must live with the damage without seeking help
According to him, urging couples to enter marriage without the right knowledge and tools places them at risk when challenges arise.
“Encouraging people to go into marriage without understanding leaves them struggling alone when difficulties surface,” he added.
The counsellor explained that marriage counselling equips couples with practical skills to build strong foundations. He noted that,
Research shows that couples who go through well-structured pre-marital counselling are less likely to divorce and more likely to enjoy fulfilling marital lives
He added that post-marital counselling also provides ongoing support to help couples restore happiness when problems occur.
Mr Adofoli further warned that advice undermining counselling has contributed to widespread marital struggles. Referring to the COVID-19 lockdown period, he said, “During COVID-19, restrictions forced couples to spend more time together. Many young couples lacked the knowledge to manage conflict, leading to increased domestic violence and relationship breakdowns worldwide.”
He stressed that many marriages failed not because love was absent, but because couples lacked the right tools and refused to seek professional help. While acknowledging that individuals can share personal marriage experiences, Mr Adofoli emphasised the importance of trained professionals.
Just as people trust doctors and teachers, couples who seek counselling benefit from expert guidance and care.
He concluded by describing marriage as a lifelong covenant that requires wisdom and guidance, quoting Proverbs 11:14: “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counsellors there is safety.”
Social media reactions
However, reactions to Mr Adofoli’s statement have been mixed on social media. While most users agreed with Wode Maya’s view that couples should learn through experience and personal growth, few supported the counsellor’s stance, insisting that professional guidance plays a critical role in sustaining healthy marriages.
Some commenters also expressed scepticism about marriage counselling, claiming that certain counsellors contribute to marital breakdowns rather than resolving them.
These opposing views have sparked renewed debate about the role and effectiveness of marriage counselling in modern relationships.
Read some comments below:
Bryt Eli,
I strongly agree with Wodemaya, marriage is practical not a written down procedure. What someone wrote in a book is far different from reality is.Majority of what are been written in the counseling books are the individuals experiences in their various marriage life and it differ from one person to another. Sir, your example about driving, is same thing Wodemaya is talking about. Respectfully submit Best regards
Gifty's Lesson
I've actually witnessed countless counseling sessions that actually led to divorce at the end
Nana Kofi Egyin,
Best counseling is from the home.Proper up bringing of the child.Teaching the girl child how to cook, wash,serve their father's and it becomes part of them and is difficult for them to do away with it .Teaching the boy child how be good husband but now we have thrown them away.That six months counseling does change anything because the person has formed his/her character already
Mamaga Nayram Afeafa
But seriously I’m not married though but I don’t see the relevance of marriage counseling… other types of counseling like mental health, finances, business fine but marriage counseling I’m not sure of it’s relevance..
Amenuvor Winnie,
In the past i never knew about counselling ,but today ive matured and realised that some counselers like yourself are needed before entering many areas of life not only marriage ! I had the opportunity of talking with you sir and i was really enlightened and came to many realizations in my life ! God bless you sir Frank Edem Adofoli
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