How to Deal With a Friend Who’s Always the Centre of Attention

We all have that one friend. The one who somehow turns every conversation back to themselves, dominates group outings, and always seems to be in the spotlight, whether they planned it or not.

While confidence and charisma aren’t bad things, constantly playing second fiddle can be draining and even hurtful. If you’ve ever left a hangout feeling invisible, annoyed or emotionally exhausted, you’re not being petty. You start questioning yourself: “Should I speak up?” “Do I sound jealous?” Let's talk about how to deal with a friend who’s always the centre of attention without losing yourself or the friendship.

Understanding the reason behind that before reacting will help you understand what might be driving their behaviour. Some people seek attention because:

• They thrive on validation and reassurance

• They’re insecure beneath the confidence

• They’ve always been rewarded for being loud or dominant

• They’re unaware of how much space they take up

  Not all attention-seeking is malicious. Sometimes it’s learned behaviour — sometimes it’s a coping mechanism.

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Ask yourself a few honest questions:

• Do I feel unheard or overshadowed around this person?

• Do I feel anxious, resentful or competitive after spending time with them?

• Am I shrinking myself to make them shine?

  
  Your feelings matter. Discomfort is often a sign that boundaries are being crossed — even unintentionally.

If the friendship matters to you, communication is key. Choose a calm moment and speak honestly, without accusations.Try phrases like:

• “Sometimes I feel a bit unheard in group conversations.”

• “I enjoy our friendship, but I’d love it if we shared the space more.”
  

  Avoid blaming language. Focus on how the behaviour makes you feel, not on labelling them as selfish or dramatic.

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You don’t have to announce boundaries for them to exist. You can:

• Speak up when you want to share something

• Redirect conversations back to yourself or others

• Limit how much personal energy you give in group settings.

  
  Boundaries are about protecting your peace, not punishing someone else.

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Trying to outshine an attention-seeking friend is exhausting and usually pointless. Instead, focus on being present, authentic and grounded. You don’t need to be the loudest person in the room to be valued. True presence speaks louder than performance.

A friend who values you will try to adjust once you speak up — even if it takes time. But if they dismiss your feelings, mock you, or continue to dominate every space, that’s important information. Healthy friendships make room for everyone.

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Being around someone who constantly takes centre stage can quietly affect your confidence. Remind yourself:

• You don’t need constant attention to be important

• Your voice has value, even if it’s softer

• You’re allowed to take up space

• Sometimes the problem isn’t that they shine, it’s that you’ve been dimming yourself.

If the friendship leaves you feeling drained, invisible or resentful most of the time, it may be time to create distance. Not every friendship is meant to last forever, and choosing peace is not a failure.You’re allowed to outgrow dynamics that no longer serve you.

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A friend who’s always the centre of attention isn’t automatically a bad person but a friendship that constantly makes you feel small is worth re-examining.

The goal isn’t to silence anyone; it’s to build relationships where everyone feels seen, heard and respected.You deserve friendships where there’s room for all of you not just the loudest parts.