Following the accusations by
Read exact words of Tiwa here>>>
With the recent outburst of your husband on Instagram, why are you just about to respond to the allegations?
The honest truth is I was in my bedroom when my friend walked into the room with a couple of other people and woke me up; and basically just started narrating what had happened. When someone wakes you up from sleep you⦠The honest truth, my first thought was I thought maybe they found him dead.
When they said they didnāt know where he was, my thought was, and everybodyās thought was, we need to find him. Heās suicidal, we need to find him, we need to make sure heās alive and heās well. So, my initial thought was not⦠I didnāt even know what he had said. It was just āLetās find him, letās make sure that heās okay and heās aliveā. So I couldnāt respond to anything because I didnāt even know the extent of what he had said till much later. Someone actually took my phone away from me. They didnāt want me to see what was said online. I was just scared for his life. I was just panicking.
At what point did you find out that he was okay and that nothing is wrong with him?
At about 10-11, we got a call. We were in my bedroom ā Bankyās mum came and she was praying, we were all praying. I know that his family in LA were praying as well. About 10-11am, we got the call that heās been found on Lekki bridge and at least he was safe. He was, I believe in Bankyās house, and he was okay.
I remember very well 2 years ago we were all in Dubai for your wedding ceremony and yesterday was supposed to be you anniversary. I saw on Instagram you posted videos of you guys celebrating your new single which was trending yesterday, TJ wasnāt there. At what point did all these events started?
My marriage and relationship has been very public and at one point I decided that I didnāt want to make it public anymore so Iām always nervous when it comes to his birthday because if I post, they read meaning to it. If I donāt then theyāll say weāve broken up or there is a problem in our relationship.
In this case I knew the anniversary was coming and I was either going to post or not, but the honest truth is that for the past two months, TJ and I have not been together. And it was something that we were trying to work through but for me I knew that this marriage wasnāt going to work. Itās been like that for the past two months, I didnāt know if I should post and keep up appearances or if I should face reality.
Did he try to contact you on your anniversary?
I havenāt spoken to TJ in about a week now, he had left the house. We were supposed to get some documents for my son, his passport actually. So I was calling TJ on Sunday night because the interview was on Monday and he had booked the interview for Jam Jam online, so I wanted to know the time and other details but he was reading the messages and he wasnāt responding.
I remember I sent a message that reads, āTJ please letās at least be friends and good parents to Jamil and whatever is going on between us please letās do this for Jamilā, but he still didnāt respond, so I left it and I know one day weāll apply for his passport.
At what point did you realize the marriage wonāt work?
I have covered up for a lot of hurt in our relationship. I was in Jamaica recently and just before I went to Jamaica, I found out that I was pregnant again. We both discussed it and tried to figure out how to manage the situation, because it was another baby so soon. So I went to London and got on a 10-hour flight to Jamaica to shoot a video with Busy Signal.
But on the morning we were supposed to shoot the video, while I was doing my make-up, I started bleeding uncontrollably, so I started panicking and I called TJ. I took pictures and sent it to him, they rushed me to the hospital, I had complications but I still couldnāt reach him, so Thompson who was with me, had to help me sign all the documents in the hospital.
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So I got discharged from the hospital and still tried to call TJ to let him know what happened because he didnāt call to see how I was or know what happened.
I got back to Nigeria and while we were sleeping, his phone was going off and it was middle of the night and I kept on seeing the name calling him āEdible Cateringā. And it didnāt make sense because why would a catering company be calling my husband at that time of the night and yes as a woman, I picked up his phone and I went through his phone got into his Whatsapp and thereās this long conversation with this same āEdibleā number.
And Iām seeing stuff like āCan we meet at the hotel tonightā, āDo you live aloneā, and āIs it ok if I come byā. The last message I saw was, āI had to leave at 7am today because you were still sleepingā. Then he responded saying, āYea because you knocked me out last night, it was a great nightā.
So obviously I woke him up and was like whatās going on, and he said to me, itās not what I think. Then I asked if all these happened on our bed, then he said no it was at a hotel but nothing happened that they were just chilling.
The thing that hurt me the most was that this happened while I was in Jamaica in a hospital and I was sending him pictures but he didnāt bother to respond because he was chilling with another woman in a hotel room.
At that point, I packed my stuff, I took my son and I went to my friendās house, her name is Tiwa as well, I stayed the night there and she asked me one question, āWhatās the next step?ā. And I said to her, āIām doneā.
Has he been cheating on you before now?
I donāt think we have enough time to cover that, I donāt even know where to start or which one to say first. Iāve covered up for so long because I wanted people to believe this story that TJ is the head of the house, heās the one that takes care of me, a loving husband, I wanted people to believe that and I wanted him to feel like a man, so I covered up so many times.
Since my son has been born, TJ has not spent one naira. I paid for the hospital bills, I paid for his flight to come to London, I paid for the apartment we stayed for two months, the clothes, the nursery, the grocery. Even when we were in London we didnāt just go shopping for my son, we shopped for TJ as well so that when we come back to Nigeria heāll have new things because his excuse most times is, āI donāt have money, I donāt have moneyā¦ā
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So I try to pay for everything because I have to pay for everything, otherwise where would we be? So at least he can go out to hustle or focus on the contracts heās looking for. And heāll still tell me he doesnāt have money to buy diapers but he has money to get haircut twice a week, he has money to do laundry, he has money to take women to hotel rooms.
Is it possible that you do everything for him but still donāt respect him as a husband?
Thatās a lie! Iām not going to sit here and lie to you that every time I come home I cook⦠and Iām not going to make excuses and say itās because of my career thatās why Iām busy. Iām the same person that works and puts money in the house, Iām the same person that works long hours to make sure we have a roof over our heads. I come home late most times and very tired, sometimes Iām out of the country. Thereās no time that I come downstairs to make something to eat and I donāt make for TJ and because I know what my schedule is, I had to hire a cook and I donāt think thereās anything wrong in that. Most times he leaves home and doesnāt come back till 7am at times 2pm the following day, so how am I supposed to cook for someone thatās not in the house?
You come back drunk, angry; we were living on eggshells because we never know what mood heāll be in. At times I even pray that heās with another woman, so that way I know heās still alive and has not gotten drunk in an accident or something else.
When you sacked him as your manager, what job did he start doing?
Iāll never discredit or take away the fact that TJ hustled for me; Iāll never deny that he worked hard for me or that he believed in me. But the first time I realized there was foul play was a time when he booked me for a wedding in London and our company policy is that you donāt go for a show till youāve been fully paid. So I got to London already and I called the accountant to confirm if payment has been made and she was like they still havenāt paid o, so I called TJ again and said these people havenāt paid and he said āno its fine, just go, just go and perform donāt worry everything is fineā.
Fortunately for me, I know one of the organizers, I pulled him aside and was like, ābros whatās going on, why havenāt you guys paidā, and he was like, āwhat are you talking about, weāve paid aboutĀ four months agoā and we tried to confirm and realized they paid into TJās personal account and not company account. Then the other thing was TJ would declare that they paid N3m meanwhile they paid N4.5m, and out of the N3M heās still receiving his management fee of 40%. So you are basically stealing from your wife and he doesnāt feel anything. So I had to perform at the wedding for free because TJ had already squandered the money.
He also accused your mum of āwitchcraftā?
My mum is based in the UK and when I had Jamil she moved back to Nigeria with us. If anyone has ever met my mother, sheās not like that. Sheās a sweet lady, sheās very British so she doesnāt hang up on traditions and she doesnāt judge. Infact a lot of times my mum will say to me, āTiwa you are the wife, be patient, donāt shout, donāt curse, a woman builds the home.ā
Whenever we have issues, TJ always runs to tell my mum and she always calms him down so sheās been nothing but a great support for me. So Iāll love for him to tell me if thereās something that my mother has done because I have no idea.
How about his allegations that you slept with Don Jazzy, Dr Sid and 2face?
I would say for the record, I have never cheated on my husband. Not with Don Jazzy, not with Dr Sid, not with 2face or anybody, and Iām willing to take a lie detector test for that. And he knows it in his heart.
(Crying) this really hurts. Iām not going to pretend like Iāve not read comments and what people are saying about me, it hurts. And itās not true.
So what do you think drove him to attempt suicide?
I know that for any human being, when your finances are not straight, youāll be depressed and be bothered. So I know that for a while, since he stopped working for me as my manager, heās been struggling financially, but that wasnāt my fault. I loved when we were working together and everybody loved us, but he messed up by starting to steal from me and being fraudulent, so I had no choice. I wanted to save my marriage by separating the business from the home, but TJ loves to keep up with the life, he wants to live a life thatās not true without a steady income. He went to buy a car that he knew he couldnāt afford, and I ended up paying the balance of about N3M and he says I took away his manhood because he doesnāt want people to know am the breadwinner.
As a woman I want him to be the breadwinner too, and thatās why I put the balance of the car in his account so theyāll think itās coming from him and not me.
He also went to buy a Rolex watch and he still couldnāt pay up the balance and so they called me and because I donāt want it to get out in the press (people have threatened me with that before) so I always find a way to put the money in his account so he can pay off the debt.
He keeps on putting us in debt all the time. He goes out to the clubs with women, spend money on drinks, leaves without paying and the club owner would call me and Iāll end up going to pay.
The last one that happened that I think really triggered this whole thing was that he went to borrow N45m from someone and heās lost the money. I just found out. I was in the studio recording and got a call that EFCC is investigating that TJ is in big trouble that people may hurt him. So in my frantic move to try and suppress the situation no one could help raise the N45m he went to borrow.
Or should we talk about the fact that I walked in on him taking cocaine in my house when we were still leaving in 1004 then. It was just after we got married and I didnāt even know he does cocaine, only to walk into the kitchen and saw him snuffing. I screamed TJ!!! And he quickly hid it and he started screaming at me! So the first thing I did was call his parents. So Iām dealing with alcohol problems, the fact that you come home late, infidelity, cocaine, debts, and a husband thatās jealous of his wifeās success.
Didnāt you see these coming before you got married?
Itās a combination of everything; I didnāt know about the cocaine, I didnāt know about his third child in Nigeria apart from the two abroad that he tells everyone. I wonāt say I didnāt see signs, even a lot of people warned me about the type of person TJ is, but I made a mistake and Iām not ashamed to say it at this point.
Now that Iāve made a mistake, do I want to wait 10 years or 15 years? If you are not happy you can leave and I was scared will I ever find somebody, will I ever find happiness, will I ever find someone else to marry me?
I donāt care at this point if I never get married again. All I care about now is being happy for Jamil. I care about being strong; I care about not walking on eggshells.
And you know what?
I do want a man that works, that can help me financially. Not saying he has to be a millionaire or billionaire, but somebody that can help or at least not put me in more debt.
Has he ever physically assaulted you?
No, and Iāll never play that victim card. But it was a mentally abusive relationship because all I hear everyday is how he made me, how he did this and that for me, I created you, I took you from nothing. He didnāt find me in a dustbin.
Whatās the status of the marriage now?
Itās finally over. Itās been over for a while and Iāve covered up for a while. I think what happened is God sent because heās made it easy for me to walk away because of what he did on social media because he got so many people angry, he called so many innocent names, he dragged many people including his own family. So if I was to consider to make it work a lot of people will warn me that if it happens again I canāt come back crying. So heās made it easy for me to finally walk away.
Iāll never stop him from seeing Jamil, never! But the only thing Iāll promise myself is to bring up my son to be a good man.
Till now I donāt wish anything bad on him, even when he was abusing me. First I was and still Iām concerned about him because Iām worried he might see this interview and trigger something else or lead him to do something bad but I donāt wish that for him.
Tonight Iām still going to pray for him. If I didnāt care about him or his well-being, I wonāt have covered up for him for this long and even now Iām still helping him find a way out from his debt.
But if thereās anything that Iāve overlooked to Tunji, Iām absolutely sorry. If have done anything wrong to neglect you or not make you feel like a man, Tunji Iām sorry and you know I tried everything, you know I love you so much and Iām sorry. I never wanted to divorce and I never wanted it to come to this and I want him to get better. Iām not just saying it for the camera but Iāll always pray for him!