Child Online Safety: 5 things parents should do before handing over a device to their children

• Establish clear rules on screen time, apps, social media, privacy and online communication before giving your child a device.

• Help children recognise strangers, inappropriate content, cyberbullying, scams and attempts to manipulate or exploit them.

• Create an environment where children feel safe reporting anything frightening, confusing or uncomfortable that happens online.

Just as we protect our children in the physical world and would never knowingly put them in harm’s way, we have to protect them in the digital world as well.

We cannot completely stop our children from using phones, tablets, laptops or the internet. And, honestly, we should not. The internet is not all bad. There is so much our children can learn from it. They can read, research, develop new skills, connect with people, explore their interests and discover opportunities that may not be available to them physically.

But just as we would not send a child into a busy street without teaching them how to cross safely, we should not hand a child a smartphone or tablet and simply expect them to know how to navigate the internet.

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There are strangers who deliberately target children. There are bullies, scammers, sexual predators and people who may try to manipulate children into sharing private information, photographs or videos. There is also harmful content that a child can stumble upon within seconds, sometimes without even looking for it.

And because children are still developing emotionally and mentally, they may not always understand the seriousness of what they see, what they are asked to do or what they share online. That is why online child safety should not begin after something has gone wrong.

It should begin before the phone is handed over. I am sure no parent wants to discover that their child has been exposed to explicit content, has been communicating with a stranger online, has been pressured to send inappropriate pictures, or has shared sensitive information about themselves or the family.

The good news is that parents do not have to be technology experts to protect their children. There are simple, practical things you can do before handing over that phone, tablet or laptop.

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Here are 5 important things every parent and guardian should consider.

Before your child starts using a device, have a conversation about what they can and cannot do with it. Do not wait until they have already downloaded several apps or created multiple social media accounts before setting the rules.

Explain when the device can be used, where it can be used and what it can be used for. Be clear about things such as screen time, online games, social media, chatting with strangers, sharing photographs and visiting websites.

Most importantly, explain why the rules exist. A child is more likely to respect a rule when they understand that the purpose is not to punish them but to keep them safe.

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Buying your child a phone and installing parental controls is not enough. Your presence matters. Ask your child what they are watching. Ask what games they are playing. Ask which apps they enjoy and who they interact with online.

This should not feel like an interrogation. Instead of constantly asking, “Who are you chatting with?” try asking, “What do you enjoy about this app?” or “What kind of things do people post there?”

These conversations can give you an idea of what your child is experiencing online without making them feel that every conversation is an investigation.

Parents sometimes make the mistake of becoming interested in their children's online lives only when there is a problem. By then, the child may already be afraid to talk. Be interested early.

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One of the biggest mistakes we can make as parents is assuming that our children will learn online safety naturally. They won't. We have to teach them. Before handing over a device, talk to your child about strangers online, inappropriate content, cyberbullying, scams, privacy and the dangers of sharing photographs.

Tell them that not everyone online is who they claim to be. A person who says they are 13 may not be 13. Someone who presents themselves as a friend may have completely different intentions. Teach your child never to arrange a physical meeting with someone they met online without involving a trusted adult.

Also teach them that nobody online should pressure them to keep secrets from their parents or guardians. And this is particularly important when it comes to sexual content. Children should know that if someone asks them for a nude or inappropriate photograph, sends them one, or asks them to do something that makes them uncomfortable, they should tell a trusted adult immediately. They should know that they will not be blamed for coming forward.

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A child whose entire world exists on a screen can become particularly vulnerable to what happens online. That is why we should not only teach children how to use technology. We should also help them build a strong life outside technology.

Encourage sports, reading, hobbies, friendships, family conversations, church or community activities, creative work and other healthy interests. Let children have time when they are simply children without a screen in front of them.

The goal should not be to make children hate technology.The goal is to make sure technology is part of their lives, not their entire lives.

Before your child starts using a device, explain that what goes online can be difficult to take back.

• A photograph can be saved.

• A message can be forwarded.

• A video can be downloaded.

• A comment made in anger can remain online long after the child has forgotten about it.

• Teach your children to think before posting or sending anything.

• They should understand that private information such as their home address, school details, passwords, phone numbers and family financial information should not be casually shared online.

Parents also need to think about their own role in protecting their children's digital footprint. We should be careful about what we post about our children, including their photographs, school information, locations and personal moments. Protecting a child's privacy starts with the adults around them.

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Giving a child a phone is no longer simply about giving them a device for communication. You are giving them access to a world. That world has knowledge, opportunities, friendships and entertainment. But it also has people and situations that children may not yet be mature enough to handle on their own.

Let them know that if they ever find themselves in a frightening, confusing or uncomfortable situation online, they can come home and talk to you.